The Week That Keeps on Giving

This was my last trip to Harrison before Elise gets here due to doctor's orders and I wanted to stay for the long haul. Amelia and I spent the whole week and Ross joined us from Wednesday on. Staying that many days has made today verrrry hard for Amelia, but I will tell about that later. For now, all the fun we had :)


On Thanksgiving Week, you...

Get to spend time with your sweet cousin.




Get tickled sipping tea with your Poppy.



Get to play with a new Playdough machine AND celebrate your Dad being off work.


On Thanksgiving Week, you...


Get to help Gammy make sweet potato casserole in your jammies.



Get to pretend you are in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade and wave from your bus.



Get to be loved on. And loved on, and loved on...




Get to wear matching dresses with Ingrid.




Get to walk to the creek with your Pa.




Get to have a surprise visit from your Mammaw.



Ahhh. What a Thanksgiving Week :)

Chismas Tee

We put up Amelia's small Christmas Tree. Yes, it is early, but we figured if Halloween was an indication of her love for seasonal things that we should stretch out the fun. And she didn't disappoint. This girl was just giddy. I asked her if she remembered her tree from last year and she said, "too little." Haha, yes you were my sweetie pie.


I wish I could get the video up of her trying to lug her tree back to her room by herself, but I apparently am not talented enough. Which doesn't surprise you since I never put videos up. One day...

Amelia got all dolled up in polka dots (her choice) for her first basketball game last night.
She absolutely loved it and was mesmerized by her Uncle D playing in the alumni game. I was impressed with her behavior and surprised by how much she seemed to enjoy it. She cried when it was over. This is a new phase--crying when something fun is over. Cue Sesame Street Live Breakdown 2010.

But, if you look this cute in a turkey dress, the breakdowns are more easily overlooked.

Gobble, gobble.

Diarrhea of the Brain

Edit: My devotional verse was Psalm 40:3 today. I read it minutes after I wrote my post.

"He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God."

I am thankful for a new song of praise. I am drowning in a sea of things to be thankful for. And, just because I acknowledge fears I am having does not overshadow or erase this fact. SO, for the rest of the afternoon, I will be singing a new song.

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Diarrhea is a really hard word to spell.

My brain is working overtime today. So is my gallbladder. This will just be a spew of thoughts. Some stinky. Some running together. Some painful to admit. But, I will feel better when it is over.

Today has been hard. Amelia had a breakdown today and wouldn't stop crying. It was like she had no idea what it stemmed from and was just crying and confused. She finally told me, "Meme and Pop's house." I told her we couldn't go there right now and then she told me, "Gammy holds Ingrid." Ah...so, she is realizing the baby is very close to coming and maybe a few jealousy issues are coming out about Ing too--or just babies in general. She then said amidst tears, "Me Mommy's baby." Okay, cue my heart breaking.

Amelia is very perceptive. There is no telling what thoughts she is trying to process in her head. I know that after Elise gets here, things will be very different. Today, I just decided maybe too different. Our schedule will be messed up, Amelia might feel resentful, she will definitely act out, she will miss playing with her friends while I recover from surgery, and I might fold under the pressure. Of course it is taboo to say these things because obviously many couples long for a child and we are blessed enough to have another on the way. In fact, one of my dearest friends is one of those couples. But, that doesn't erase the fear I am feeling right now. Even if it is fleeting, today is a hard day. I don't want to cheat Amelia. Nor do I want to cheat Elise. I haven't even spent the energy I want to spend being excited about her arrival because I am spending so much energy worrying about Amelia. A friend that knows me too well sent me this a few weeks ago just as these feelings were stirring up.

And are you having panic attacks yet about if you will be cheating baby # 1 when you have baby # 2? and how in the world will you possibly be able to love another living being half as much as you love Amelia? (I panicked all the way to the hospital and all the hours before Adam was born-worried for months before.) It will be miraculously okay.

Yes, it will miraculously be okay. We will be a family of four and I will love my girls so much that my heart can barely contain it. I remember writing a post around week four of Amelia's life and I was wondering what I had gotten into. Things were tough. I was exhausted. Parenting seemed bleak. And now, as I look at my fears the second time around, I can't help but laugh. Things have surely changed. How wonderfully and fulfillingly they have changed.

So, this is just the beginning of a new journey--new tears, new victories, and new challenges. I pray Amelia is so blessed with Elise's presence that she can never imagine her life without her. The same way that I feel about Stephanie. I always called her my built in best friend and she is that to this day.

I'm still terrified. My stomach is gurgling a bit. The tears aren't totally gone. But, I do feel better. Thanks for listening.

As Jaimi told me via text, "Some of this is hormones." Ding. Ding. Ding.

As I told Jaimi, "I hope a LOT of this is hormones."

Amelia told me the following before nap, "Me happy now Mom." Then she planted a big smooch on my nose and said, "Sticker on boob?" How did she know a Dora sticker on my boob would make everything okay? Man, I love her. And Elise Mae, I love you too, with the same fierceness.

Interesting...

We have been having trouble with Amelia not wanting to get her diaper changed. The fits range from small and easily deterred to large, screaming tantrums. I guess she just doesn't want to stop what she is doing to get changed, but we are trying everything these days to have a successful diaper change with no problems. Last night, Ross laid down on the floor to pretend to have his diaper changed. She thought this was hilarious and got hers changed right beside him with no problems. Then, she jumped up and wiped his bottom with a wipe. She said, "Poop off now dad." Weird.

Then, Ross said, "Hey, Heather, what if I was laying here and really did have poop?" Umm seriously? I really don't know about him sometimes. Weirder.

End of February is my estimated potty training start goal. I pray that it doesn't result in Ross wearing Dora panties. Weirdest.

Steph gave me the idea to make an owl puppet out of a paper bag and Amelia absolutely loved him. The construction paper feathers were a hit and she helped crinkle them. Provided at least an hour of fun. I glued the feathers on the wrong way because I didn't listen to her instructions, but he still was super cute.
Amelia and Ing were twins at church. Derek has the money shot that I am anxiously awaiting, but here is a glimpse at how precious their matching dresses were. Amelia is crazy about Ingrid and talks about her all the time.


Here we are before story time. We are quite excited! I love Wednesday story time because the lady in charge does such wonderful songs, books, crafts, and stations. It is really educational and Amelia and I have been going to story time since she was seven months old. It has been fun to watch her come out of her shell more and now she really gets down and boogies during song time.

For Kim

And, for anyone else on the edge of his or her seat. :)

The weekend was a blast. We hadn't been to Harrison in three weeks because everyone kept coming to us (which is niiiice too) and so Amelia was tickled beyond tickled to get there. We had a fun dinner with G and Pa on Friday and Amelia only wanted her Pa to hold her, sit by her at dinner, and ride with her in HER car. Hilarious.

Saturday we had Meme's party and Amelia had down this phrase perfectly, "Happy Birthday Meme." She said it all day and I melted every time. Delicious cookout and sides, FOUR yummy birthday desserts--including cupcakes that Amelia loved- and lots of fun presents. I got to hold Ingrid a lot and she honestly couldn't have any better disposition. Just like her mom. Here are some pics...


I love this sweet picture Ross snapped. Amelia is so incredibly proud of herself here for taking Meme's presents over. Ahh..that used to be my favorite job at parties.
Meme you are full of vibrancy, vigor, vitality, and you've still got that va va voom at 74. You know I love you with all my heart. Hope you had a great party---my crew sure enjoyed it.

Church was great and after a good lunch we headed to Jasper for Brandy's baby shower. She got a ton of stuff for Lily and it was great to see her. Not sure if I will see her again before Elise gets here...weird. Steph took some pictures there and I will get those from her.

The ride home last night was insane. Amelia cried the entire hour to our house. Screaming for Gammy and Gampy. Ross said, "it didn't bother me and wasn't really that bad." Hmm, he never ceases to amaze me. I was going insane and tried to reason with her, bribe her, everything I could think of. We ate supper and she started in again and wanted "Gammy's straw cup" and on and on. This morning she wanted Gammy or Gampy to hold her when she woke up. I finally got it through her head that they don't live with us and we have had a wonderful day together. She loves gym more and more and is becoming stronger and braver on the equipment.

This weekend with the house full of family and oohhing at Ing and gabbing with Buzz, I got really nervous about adding Elise in the mix. Excited. But, nervous. Eeeeek....

Greatest Night Ever

I am not exaggerating. I always build things up in my head and think they are going to be SO fun--as in earth shattering. A lot of times, this works and things are more fun to me than anyone else. But, sometimes--especially with a kid-- things just don't turn out like you think and you have to go with it.

BUT- This rocked our world. Amelia was so tickled that she kept clapping and shaking. Not kidding. The characters were so vibrant and the show was stellar, even for the adults. When Big Bird came out to introduce the show she yelled out, "HIIIII Bird," at the top of her lungs. She proceeded to do this for each character. But, I am getting ahead of myself. Here she is before the show with Lynna, her BFF.



Lynna gave her an Abby doll so that they could both have one at the show. Amelia slept with it last night :) When the music and lights started, the wonder in her eyes was really moving. I cried. I don't think it had to do with pregnancy hormones, but it could have. It was really about seeing her love something so much and I was just really excited for her.

I didn't get many pictures during the show because it was so fun and so dark. Here are a few.




And guess who was there? Bert! She was screaming his name when he came out dancing haha. The songs were catchy and all the parents had a great time as well. Amelia and Lynna were so good. Not a peep out of them or a restless moment--I was very proud. However, they both burst into tears when the show was over. Amelia cried for Elmo half of the way home. Ross said, "At least she loved it."

She didn't get to sleep until 10:15 due to happiness overload, but was still up at 6:20. For the love :)

"Can you tell me how to get, how to get to Sesame Street?"

Family Time

We are so glad that Ross is on an easier rotation this month. Especially with the new darkness settling so early. Amelia keeps informing me, "Mom, sun 'sleep--night night?" I told her the sun is going to bed early because he is tired and we are just going to stay up and play longer (being that this question is asked at six). That has satisfied her. Anyway, it has been fun to have Ross home longer in the evening for more play time.

I wasn't going to tell Amelia about Sesame Street Live until tomorrow, but Lynna was babbling about it excitedly at gymnastics and Amelia looked super confused. So, I broke down and explained that we were going to see Elmo and Abby and Big Bird in person. She is elated and keeps reminding us every thirty minutes ha. The strangest thing is that she keeps asking if Bert is going to be there. Who likes Bert? Ross and I were cracking up and told her maybe. So now she keeps walking around chanting, "Maybe Bert be there."
I never post in the morning, but Amelia is watching Sesame Street and she told me, "Mom, out." Hmm, okay then you little stink pot. She is sitting in there mumbling things to Elmo.

Yesterday was 70 degrees and beautiful and after gymnastics we went to the park. It was so fun, but Amelia only wanted to play on the big playset. She usually likes the two smaller slides and I got sad because she is SO big.

Daylight StealYourSleep Time

I put Amelia to bed a full hour and a half LATE hoping to compensate for this ridiculous fall back mess. However, she still awoke at six, obviously thinking it was seven. I don't do six--period. Hmph. She fell asleep early for nap (still can't get over how sweet she looks in her bed) and maybe things will get on track this week.
She was wonderful at church today and I honestly cannot believe how much better it is going to leave her in the nursery. Answered prayers for sure. I actually am back to focusing 100% on the sermon and not worrying about her. :) It seems she always has a quirk and the new one the past two times I have left her is that she won't eat a snack with the group. She told them she eats with her mom. LOL.

We have been making turkeys...


And painting important things...
And reading books to an audience...
Seeing Goga in the foreground gets me tickled. I am WAY into naming everything. Lately I have asked Amelia (when she gets something new) what she thinks their name is. She named her doll in the pink pajamas Pink and her new giraffe Giraffe and so forth. However, the last few weeks she has gotten creative. The pink wiggle thing is Goga and she got three new dog figurines and named them Yaya, Yaya 2, and Jack. Oh, I love it.

Ross is on call today and Amelia cried when he left this morning, screaming, "NO WORK DADDY, NO WORK." Bless her heart--that is the first time she has acted distraught. Thankfully a cup of milk and a Sunday morning show were the perfect distractions.

Temper Tantrums

Oh my, this time it was me that had a fit. We met Mom, Steph, and Ing in Branson to eat at Chili's and were then going to go to Kohl's and maybe Target. We waited forever for a table (not due to there not being any, just due to the host being incompetent) and then when we were seated, our food didn't come for ONE HOUR. After that, we still had to eat of course and got out of there ten minutes until Buzzy's bedtime with a thirty minute drive home. I was peeeeved. We got half off of our check, but what good does that really do? I hate when my plans are messed up. Honestly, I haven't gotten mad like that in a while, but I let it ruin the whole dinner. Not just mine--everyone's. Amelia and Ingrid were good at the restaurant. I wasn't. Sigh. We just drove straight back home and I pouted the whole way.

On top of that, we won't see Ross any because he is on Sunday call and can't go to church with us and won't be home until after Amelia's bedtime. AND, Amelia was up about three and a half hours total last night because she still has not cut one single tooth trying to poke through. Her gums are a million times their normal size. Poor thing. I slept on the floor beside her bed trying to calm her, but I wasn't much use and just ended up with a backache of pregnant proportions.

Fun times.

Let's skip to real fun times instead of those two paragraphs of junk. Ross found this fish game in the under ten dollar section at Walgreens and really wanted to get it for Amelia. I was not so sure she could work it, but what a night of fun it turned out to be. We have played it several nights since. Actually, Ross almost got his turn revoked because he was trying to catch all the fish before Amelia could even catch one. :) He wants to play Derek or Jared or Dad at Christmas. Nope, I'm not kidding.


She was so proud when she caught one! I was too because she is not very patient and gives up if she isn't good at something right away. We have been working on this and she is making big strides. She also went to MOPS and church nursery without CRYING!! We were so elated :)

After nap yesterday Amelia wanted to read a book in her bed instead of coming out to watch a show. I snapped a picture because I cannot resist shots of her "reading" alone. You are right Ally--I just love it.

Wednesday evening we are going to Sesame Street Live in Springfield and I am so excited/nervous. Not sure how Amelia will do, but she is really into Elmo and Ernie and Abby right now, so I hope she has a great time. If she doesn't, no temper tantrums from me :)

Scary Things

In honor of Halloween's 2010 passing--some scary things--in no particular order...

1. Toddler Bed Assembling-- Amelia needed out of her Pack N Play for several reasons--a few of those being safety-- and so we bit the bullet for a Halloween switcheroo. Mom and Dad helped us get the new bed together and in place and Amelia was thrilled at how it looked. I mean thrilled. I couldn't believe when she just ooohed and ahhed over it because we have never even mentioned big girl beds, nor made a big deal out of them. However, I was (and still am really) a nervous wreck that she would fall out or hate it or run around in the night. We made it through the first two nights with her normal wake-ups and pat-backs. She also slept until seven fifteen both mornings. So proud! She napped in there yesterday and is today. Whew--this is big. Praying for a solid transition by the time Elise gets here and the Pack N Play days will be a mere memory. Speaking of praying, Sunday night I texted Emily that I was nervous and felt like I wouldn't be able to sleep a wink and she suggested that I go say a prayer over Amelia. Good friend. I did, and felt much calmer. You know, for me.

Oh, throwing Ross some credit. He slept on the floor all night in the hall the first night so that if she did get out of bed and by some rare chance I didn't hear her, he would block her from going into the living room. This wasn't his idea, but he carried it through :)

2. Fit Throwing-- Seriously. Whew. Amelia doesn't throw many fits (yet) and I know I posted a few weeks ago where she had a fit outbreak and went back to normal. Yesterday was an outbreak. Kind of like when I watch the radar for storms---I was watching every signal for a possible fit. I missed several apparently. I won't even go through the list of things that caused these fits because they were so minor and ridic. However, they resulted in--Amelia hitting her face, biting her own arm, laying on the floor and banging her head, and crying until she was choking. Holy cow. I almost called James Dobson or Dr. Phil. Instead, I called Mom. And she reminded me that Amelia is still cutting five teeth. So, that gave me a little dose of patience and then I told Ross. He laughed and said, "She is a toddler, Heather."

Wow, the wisdom of that man. Honestly though, he is right. And my expectations of her behavior are very high. Especially when she usually meets them. But, biting your own arm? Today she is back to angel pie status. Thank goodness. These fits are u g l y. But, she is my Buzzy Bee no matter what. She was adorable all day Sunday when Mom and Dad were here. Smiley city.
3. Nursery Decorating-- I had five million things crammed in the spare room and Mom literally got it all cleaned in under four hours. The crib is up, changing table in, wall decals on, mobile in place. Head spinning. Makes it seem very close!! We all worked really hard to get this done and after Dad assembled the toddler bed and crib, he kept Amelia occupied while we put everything away. They had a blast. Nursery pics later.


4. Pant Peeing- I had a C-section as most of you know, and thus, my umm lady parts experienced no stretching or tearing. However, this pregnancy I cannot stop peeing my pants. Too much information, right? It is becoming insane. I will be fully dressed, ready to walk out the door, and sneeze. Normally, a "bless you" and I would be on my way. But now I have to go change clothes because I pee on myself with almost every sneeze. Unless I umm you know, hold my crotch. Sometimes it is a drizzle and sometimes it is a mop up job. I feel better getting this out and I know you feel better reading it.



Not So Scary Things

1. Trick Or Treating- Amelia loved this whole holiday and will be a bit confused when there is not another chance to dress up in costume ha. She went to Aunt Jen's and had a great time and even wanted to go to a few other houses in the neighborhood. Although shy at the door, she always peeped out trick or treat.





2. Banana Eating- This is random, but Amelia usually eats little cut up pieces of banana for snack. She asked this morning if she could eat the whole banana. I thought it was strange, but handed it to her and she wanted me to take her picture. Lol. She thought it was so cool to hold it "me self."


3. Fall Television-- Oh Desperate Housewives your storyline is so great this season. And Amazing Race is as amazing as ever. Although I wish the two clueless people would have gone home Sunday night. Survivor is great and I am hoping Marty makes it to the merge. For some reason I like the guy and think he is a good player. He's no Russell, but...

Project Runway was fabulous this season, but I was disappointed in the finale. Mondo is my winner. His clothes were insane and I loved them. I think Gretchen is talented, but I wasn't as sold on her stuff.

Steph, you might never make it through this post.